


Hello, Goodbye

by TheTruthBetweenRPF (TheTruthBetween)



Category: Broadway RPF, Wicked RPF
Genre: Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-02
Updated: 2012-05-02
Packaged: 2017-11-04 17:45:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/396492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTruthBetween/pseuds/TheTruthBetweenRPF
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You and I / Have barely met / And I just don't want to let go of you yet ~ Hello, Goodbye, by Michael W. Smith</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hello, Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> ANGST OF DOOM. And baby death.

Eden's fingertips turned white as she pressed them against the glass, staring down at the tiny life, struggling to simply keep breathing. It was late, or early, but the nurses in the NICU had taken pity on her and let her in.

"Mijo..."

The whispered word broke the stillness, and tears gathered in the dark eyes. She blinked them away, wanting an unobstructed view of her baby.

"Eden?" Slender but strong arms enfolded her, and she sagged against Julia's body. Lips brushed Eden's temple.

"He's so tiny," Eden breathed. Her fingers traced the outline of his form, from her perspective, against the glass. She tried to ignore the tubes and monitors attached to him.

Another kiss to Eden's temple, and Julia whispered back, "He's strong, honey. He'll make it."

Eden leaned further into her wife's body. "Promise?"

Looking down at the baby, Julia, guiltily, stayed silent.

Eden closed her eyes for a moment, fighting the sense of betrayal at the other woman's silence.

"Sweetie, you need to sleep," Julia murmured, attempting to guide Eden away from the baby.

"I'm not leaving."

Julia sighed. "Eden, I know you want to be here, and so do I. But making yourself sick isn't going to do any good." She didn't add that after a hard labor with major complications, the brunette shouldn't even be out of bed so soon.

"You're not the one who carried him. You don't understand."

Nearly drawing back, Julia tensed. She forced herself to stay, hold her wife, and told herself that Eden was just hurting. She was, too, but she didn't have time to break down, to lose herself to the crushing weight of watching her son dying. She needing to be there for her wife.

It was another half hour before Eden finally allowed herself to be led away, and although her attitude was distant, she clutched Julia's hand so tightly that the blonde's fingers went cold and numb.

When she got Eden back into bed, Julia crawled onto the tiny mattress with her wife and held her, waiting until the other woman was asleep before allowing her breath to turn into shuddering inhales.

Only a few hours later, a nurse came in and shook Julia's and Eden's shoulders. "Ms. Murney? Ms. Espinosa?"

Another nurse followed, a blue bundle in her arms. She smiled, but her eyes were sad as she handed the blanketed baby to Eden.

"What...?" Mind still fuzzy from sleep, Eden stared down at her son for a moment before looking back up at the nurses. "What's going on?"

Julia, able to awake much more quickly (and not nearly as exhausted) caught on right away, and squeezed Eden's forearm.

"I'm sorry," the second nurse said, and cleared her throat.

"The doctor says it'll be any time now," the first nurse added, then they both left.

"Any..." Eden's eyes widened, and she jerked her head to stare at Julia, horrified. "No... Julia, please, no!"

Helpless, Julia brushed the hair back from Eden's face.

Eden looked down at the baby again, and her eyes clouded. Mumbling, not even conscious of the words passing her lips, she delicately traced his features. "God, please, no, please, Dios, por favor, no, no lo toma, please..."

Julia inhaled, and held the air in her lungs until that overrode the lump in her throat and ache in her jaw and temples from trying to not cry. _Please_ , she added silently. _I don't pray often enough, I know that, but please, God, please, don't take our son_.

Lifting the baby, Eden pressed her face against his, begging and praying harder than she ever had as she inhaled his soft scent. A sob rose in her throat as she felt the tiny puffs of warm air against her cheek.

Reaching out, almost afraid to touch him, Julia took the baby's hand in hers, directing his fingers to curl around her index. She kissed the soft skin, and smiled shakily.

Eden pulled back slightly, and wiped away a tear that had dripped onto the baby's cheek. Needing to feel his life, proof that maybe, _maybe_ he would make it, she hovered her fingers above his nose and mouth.

And felt nothing.

"No!"

The choked exclamation would have startled Julia, had she not been expecting it. The baby's loose grip on her finger had fallen away completely a moment before. She wrapped one arm around Eden, the other around the baby, holding the three of them together.

Eden hunched over, holding him to her chest, the tears falling harder and faster.

Julia closed her eyes against her own tears, but they stubbornly trailed down her cheeks. She pressed her lips to Eden's temple, whispering, "I love you."

The brunette only cried harder, and only once she had fallen into an exhausted half-sleep did the nurses come back. Eden stirred when they gently took the baby's still form, but Julia soothed her, and then she was lost in darkness, her sleep mercifully dreamless.

Julia, unable to sleep, wept.


End file.
